For some people confidence is easy and that may be due to the way they were raised or just the way their brain is wired.
But for most of us confidence is something we need to nurture and develop. The way we can gain confidence is to build on past success, focus on our goals, keep a balanced perspective and understand that on a basic human level we are just as deserving as anyone else.
Building on past successes is the best way to get yourself in a state of mind that builds confidence.
You have had successes and failures but the failures are just those things you tried that didn’t work, so even your failures are seeds of success.
Think back on your successes. Remember how you felt. Remember how things just seemed to flow together in the afterglow of that success.
Stand up (literally) and recreate that physical sensation when you stood a bit taller and your face wore a constant smile. You felt like you could take on anything and succeed. Think for awhile about your physical and emotional feelings and lock that down so you can recall it whenever you are doubting yourself and change your state of mind back to a confident attitude.
Focus on the goal.
Another great way to build your confidence is to focus on the goal that you have chosen for yourself.
Your personal goal should be one that fires you up and gets you excited to take the next step.
Even though you need to build confidence to ask for a pay raise your goal may be bigger than the pay raise.
Your goal may be to earn the money you need to pursue a passion to help others or travel or whatever you have chosen as a life goal.
Now when you think about how you will be able to do the things you want to do when you have your pay raise you can feel that inner passion stoking the flames and building your confidence to move in the direction of your goal.
Keep a balanced perspective.
Your perspective of your past performance should be balanced so that you understand that you are human: that you have had both wins and losses.
But, your performance is the averaging of those wins and losses:
Your confidence is not from arrogance or some idea that you are perfect. Your confidence comes from the knowledge that you are committed to striving to be better and do better for you and your employer. Your confidence is not loud and obnoxious, it is calm and deliberate. Your confidence is from your heart; it is the strength in you that is based in the best part of who your are.
You are worthy. Part of the Salary Step Up series focuses on determining what you have done and are doing to warrant a pay raise.
As you make your way through that part of the program you will realize that you deserve your raise.
By knowing the facts, you become confident that you are worthy of your request.
You deserve to be paid appropriately for the job you do, for the contributions you make.
Take the knowledge that you are worth what you are asking for and use it to drive out any doubt whispering in your ear that you don’t deserve a salary step up and that you should just keep your head down and be grateful for what you have.
That voice of doubt is trying to keep you from harm but since you have done your homework and know the facts you can calmly push that doubt aside, allow your confidence to direct your thoughts and take immediate action.
Talk to you soon,